I have been up and down with emotions - at certain times I am fine raising a child with extreme needs and then other days - I just break down and wonder if I can handle it and why why why us - and just break down in a good cry.
I won tickets the other day to a play, Guys and Dolls and offered them to our WONDERFUL daycare provider and she said that I should go - and so I took her up on the offer - she watched both of my children over night while a co-worker and myself went to dinner and the show - we even went for a drink afterwards- boy did I need this - I just felt totally rejuvenated -
The down side is that I have troubles finding people to do things with - most people get to do things with their co-workers (as friends) and well since I teach in a village - our staff members live all over and so it is tough to connect with anyone. I still chum around with my best friend since 8th grade- however she too - has a busy life- 3 kids, works full-time, plus goes to nursing school. My mom is wonderful also to do things with - but this week my dad is on vacation so they left for the week -plus she is still recovering from knee surgery that occurred back in October and now she will be having the second knee done this month. We use to have a ladies night out in our neighborhood - but that fizzled - I only have one sister and she lives 30 miles away.
At times I wish there was a friend finding service - instead of just dating services - I don't need a dating service since I am married - but would like to know how does one meet new friends - when you are in the upper 30's - I can't get to the gym to meet anyone there- I am not a bar person - I just know that I need to get out more to rejuvenate my soul without kids - and I am thinking that will be a goal this year- to get out at least once per month and totally enjoy myself - I think it was easier to type than to full-fill. Wish me luck!
A quick update on seizures - we have now upped his generic Keppra to 3.2 twice a day - he has been having about 3 seizures a day since weaning him off of Vigabitran - the bad thing about this is that he has begun to throw up after each seizures - which typically wears the little guy out - on a good note - he has been full of energy and I even heard him laugh twice - which is a heartwarming - I am going to try to film it and place it on this blog -